Dear diary: it is almost the end and the holidays are starting

I was so excited to start school again this semester. I was doing okay, and in the end I’m always failing. I wish I could start the semester over. At this point I am so desperate that I  am trying to pay someone to do a project for me! But, anyway I am trying to do one thing at a time so I don’t stress myself out too much like last time. No need for a panic attack again.

I’m always missing my dad, but it’s mostly during this time of year. He’s always all alone, wish he was here. My sisters and brothers and I haven’t spent the holidays with him for about 4 year now. I”m hoping he gets to come home for his birthday in February. Every time he comes home, I go all out. I’d do and buy anything for him. He deserves the best!

Thanksgiving week is always crazy, making all the foods and planning everything out since I have such a big family. I’m always excited to spend time with my family and eat lots and do something fun. I really just wanna relax and be able to breathe!

Jordan and I are still doing very well. He had told me last week that he wants to do the CHP program soon, he wants to make money so I don’t have to worry about working. Basically, he wants to me finish school and he’ll take care of me. I had just said…..but I want to work….. It’s nice to know that someone wants to take care of you in the near future. It feels really nice. This is the kind of man I want! He is such a gentlemen. I still want and need to work of course for myself. I don’t want to be one of those wives who uses their husbands money…. I mean that’s cool and all, but just in case one day, I don’t have him I have my own money at least. HAHA Jordan really does care about me and thinks about me. It’s really amazing. I really hope he becomes what he wants to be and hopefully one day I’ll graduate!

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