Dear diary: What a surprise!

Interesting…..I opened Mitchell’s snap last night and it was a picture of him and he said, “Hi Autumn.” I didn’t respond because it was really late and I didn’t want to deal with it.

Been up since 4am this morning. I couldn’t sleep because of all the noise and I was thinking about what to say to Mitchell. I felt shaky all day, I don’t know what it is. I responded to him this morning and said, “Hi Mitchell, I opened your snap chat pretty late last night. Whatever is it you can text me. If it’s nothing then it’s nothing, but I just wanted to respond back and say hi and that I hope you had a nice vacation.” A few hours later, he texted back and said, “Hey Autumn, I noticed you added me on snap so I was just saying hi. I had a great trip but I’m experiencing the worst jet lag. How are you? How is school? How many classes are you taking?” WOW…..he actually cares? Asking me questions?! I was so surprised. I have been feeling nervous all day and I feel like I can’t breathe. Mitchell texting me out of nowhere is just a surprise! I didn’t respond right away because I was at work and I just couldn’t deal with at the moment. My heart was beating fast! I told my best friend MJ, why is he texting me? She told me, “You know, he just wants to know that he is wanted. It’s hard for him after he was rejected. You also need to realize he is texting you because he knows you are amazing! The thing is, you really made him feel special and wanted.” I really don’t care if it was hard for him, it was more difficult for me. He doesn’t know how he made me feel. I have so much to offer and so much love to give and he didn’t want it because he couldn’t get over himself and his past. I had to let go. I had ask another one of my best friend, what does Mitchell want? Why now? He said, well maybe his trip changed him blah blah blah. Maybe……..But I doubt it. But really though, what does he want? I feel like I’m getting mixed signals or is it just me. My feelings are so off then on.  So I texted him back after work and just saying how school is great and all. Let’s see what happens next…….(sigh).

Work was so stupid today, it was slow and I did this lady’s gel manicure and didn’t even get paid for it but I kept the tip. She said I didn’t do a good job so she’s going to come back to redo it for fee. K whatever, I know I did a good job she is just picky. I’m over it. People are dumb.

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